She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Randomize
