How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
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