Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
I need mimosas to revive my soul
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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