And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
We had to coat check the pizza.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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