I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize