I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I think people are normalizing furries
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Randomize
