I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
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