I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Randomize
