everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Randomize
