Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
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