Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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