Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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