I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
