i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
