11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
Randomize
