There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
