You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
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