don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
