he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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