We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
I know her cup size but not her name....
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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