your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Randomize
