just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
where does the pee come out of this thing
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Randomize
