how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
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