When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
where does the pee come out of this thing
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Randomize
