I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Randomize
