So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Randomize
