Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
please come you make the beer taste better
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Randomize
