Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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