After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
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