Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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