Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
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