he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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