so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Randomize
