just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I have already put on my inside pants.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I would fuck him just for his dog
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