relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Randomize
