I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Randomize
