what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
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