Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize