its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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