Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
she looked like the before picture.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize