Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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