She swung at the pinata with crutches
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
