Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
