Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
