I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
