i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
