There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
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