they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
