The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
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