im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
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